Watching

Do you ever have those days when you feel like you are living life, but it is happening outside of you? And not in a bad way, but just that nothing matters except the moment you have now, that the only important things are happening now, and you forget everything else?
It was like living in a movie. As he drove, it was pleasant to have almost no thought. His wrangler chugged along, while we drove with the windows down and old music pumping. Loose curls fell around my face, big sunglasses framed my eyes. I had tied my bandana around my next, 70s style. I looked like a 70s wife...or something. Maybe a young wife. And him totally grunge 60s, his bandana tied around his forehead, with his crazy hair overflowing. We looked like we'd walked out of a movie, and were heading to a beach, matching green shirts and all.
"Hey there honeycakes."
It just felt so painless and effortless, and I never wanted to lose this moment, this calm, this friendship. I had found my people.
Then there were the times you felt like you were in the twilight zone.
I drove through the valley and everything felt surreal. Things I had once loved and grew up with seemed familiar and unreal. The valley felt so small, I almost felt trapped. I was no small city girl, I'd discovered. I was born for a big world, as scary as it was. And in this bubble, it wasn't real, and I drove away, leaving behind that claustrophobic, strangling feeling. I was fine to visit, but that was no longer where I wanted to live at all. There was just something in the air, something that said my soul would be trampled out of me there. Too small and too oppressive for me to live a life of happiness there, with a million weird looks and judgments from all directions.
Yes I was glad to move on from there.