Stage Two

Anger.
I felt unruly rage. How could people act like this? How could people look me in the face and say the things they said?
I just couldn't believe someone would bury their face in my hair, sit with me, and hold me in their arms.
Maybe I was putting more stock by his actions than I should.
But the air was electric. I could feel the tension between us that only meant one thing. And he just stayed. And stayed. And stayed.
I knew this behavior. I knew that it meant he couldn't leave until he kissed me.
So when he said he'd found someone else, I was a little more than shocked.
"Then why are you touching me?"
Of all the good intentions, to come as a friend, I knew something he didn't. I had been in this exact same position myself once. You told yourself you were being a good friend. But deep in there somewhere, your actions had a different motive. A motive to see someone, because you still feel for them, it's just convenient they need you there as a friend.
Coming as a friend might be what you want it to be, what you say it is, but that isn't what it is, if you really think about it.
I thought about my anger carefully. Better to feel anger than sadness, I guess. I couldn't feel anything for anyone else but him, and so I would have to stop feeling for him. I would have to move on.
The thing that struck me as odd was all his feelings about this. I didn't think he understood correctly how he would feel. Unless he didn't have a heart. He thought he would be over it sooner, but I saw this girl as the device that she was in part. He probably still cared about her, but he needed her to move on. I couldn't argue with it, I had done that before.
I didn't want anybody else to be hurt like I was.
But I guess I couldn't control that.
So I would give into my rage for now, and hopefully the world would right itself if I just kept pushing forward into life.